Good morning, friends!
It’s been a while since I’ve made regular blog posts, so I wanted to hop online and give a life update.
The past two years have been chaotic. Thanks to the global pandemic, everyone’s lives have experienced great upheaval- and I’m no exception.
I began January 2020 stressed out due to family and personal issues and ready for a change. After years of postponing my college graduation due to medical issues, I had accumulated lots of student debt. Working part-time at Starbucks while studying didn’t do much to help my finances, and I owed thousands of dollars on my credit card and to my boyfriend, Stephen. Worst of all, my car (my only asset) was days away from being reposessed!
Luckily, I had managed to land a lucrative full-time software consulting contract starting that month. I had also spent the past few months studying to get my ACE Personal Trainer certification. My test was scheduled for March 2020, which was when my boyfriend and I planned on launching a joint personal training company. Despite my overwhelming debt, I was on the right path to pay it all off and find a fulfilling career path.
Unfortunately, in March 2020 COVID-19 was declared a worldwide pandemic. My in-person CPR test (which I was required to take before I was eligible to sit for the ACE Personal Trainer examination) was canceled, forcing me to postpone my ACE certification as well. Since I would no longer be a CPT, I decided to cancel the launch of my personal training company. Plus, the pandemic closed gyms across the country- even if I could ethically sell workout plans, what was the point if people weren’t able to follow them?
Disappointed, I threw myself into my software consulting contract. Instead of working 40 hours per week, I decided to work 70+ hours per week instead. After all, we were stuck inside our apartment- I had nothing else to do! Even better, working more hours would mean that I’d pay off my debt even faster. It was a win-win situation!
Problem is, I’ve always had a problem with overworking myself. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety for most of my life. If I kept myself busy with work and school, I didn’t have time to dwell on my negative thoughts.
After lots of therapy in my mid-20’s, I was able to break that mindset and create a more balanced schedule. However, the onset of the pandemic provided the perfect excuse to slip right back into my unhealthy habits.
As the pandemic dragged on, my debt disappeared, but my mental health began to decline.
May 2020 brought another big life change: Stephen and I moved from Arizona to California. While the move itself was pretty chaotic, the most stressful part was leaving my friends and family behind. Because of lockdowns, I was unable to say goodbye in person. Since my family was going through a rough time, it was especially difficult to leave them behind.
Moving made me more sad and anxious, so I continued to increase my hours at work. COVID restrictions relaxed a little, so I began to travel back and forth from California to Arizona to visit my family and support them through their health struggles. Unfortunately, I didn’t decrease my hours at work to accommodate my travel schedule. My life became an exhausting blur of packing, traveling, and 12-14 hour work days, and before I knew it it was the end of 2021.
Truth be told, in grew up a lot during the pandemic. I realized that I was capable of handling a lot more than I could ever have dreamed. My relationships with my friends and family deepened. I learned a lot about what I value and what I appreciate in life.
I also learned that my priorities are completely out of whack. For years, I spent most of my time doing things that I thought other people wanted from me. This led me to ignore my own needs. Even worse, I wasn’t doing anything that actually made anyone else happy, since I had never bothered to communicate with anyone in the first place.
At the beginning of any commercial flight, flight attendants give a quick lesson about airplane safety. In the event that oxygen masks are deployed, passengers are instructed to secure their own oxygen mask before helping others. Instead of putting on my oxygen mask, I was frantically trying to throw oxygen masks at other passengers who didn’t need them and then collapsing from oxygen deprivation!
Now that I’ve shared a little more about my life over the past two years, let’s circle back to the reason behind this post: why I’ve been MIA.
Over the last few months, I’ve done a great job of reorganizing my priorities. I’ve slowly cut down my work hours and decreased many of my personal obligations. I redecorated my house, reorganized my house, and got rid of a lot of extra belongings that I no longer needed. I took care of to-do list items that I had been procrastinating. Because I have less on my plate that I have to worry about, my life is a lot less stressful.
However, I hadn’t had much free time to publish blog posts. Don’t worry- I have tons of exciting content in the works for Happy Healthy Stylish! I just needed to take some time to get my life in order before I set aside time to create it.
I can’t wait to share what I have planned! For now, stay healthy, and stay strong. Hopefully, the pandemic will be over soon and we can all enjoy a little more normalcy.